Esmeralda!! Esmeralda!!

With hope in our hearts and a plan hatching we decided to get over to the Bell early and take a look at the green. With only two of our team having bowled the Bell in the last twenty years we had hoped to get everyone as much time to see the green and as much time in the role up as we could. As with all best laid plans however, there where a few complications. The first complication was self inflicted when like a dullard I listened to Jack and decided to go through Acocks Green, only to sit in unspeakable traffic having to listen to Jack's vivid description of his recent bladder illness. The second error was going the back way to avoid Harborne high street. We came face to face with a four way temporary traffic light arrangement that gave you all of five seconds on green. To further complicate this issue the doofuses who were doing the repairs parked their van in in the way. This resulted in a van and a bus getting stuck and some hilarious face pulling From the bungee killer who was following behind. I have never seen him so animated oohing and ahhing, wincing, bracing himself and of course threatening violence to anything that passed withing 2 foot of his paintwork.

Due to an outrageously early set out time we still managed to arrive early for the game. It was a pleasure to see the pub itself doing well and the beer garden area restored to its former glory even if the clubhouse was looking a little tatty inside. We received a warm welcome from our hosts especially the Duggins who had come on a family outing to see us. It is lovely to see Chelle and Steve but i have no idea who it was they paid to play the part of Daisy but I'm she was ten years too old at least. With no game for the New Inns, Nodger also came up with OJ to laugh at us. OJ at five is alreadt a better bowler than Nodger, but to be fair OJ at two was better than Nodger.

The role up started well as we split in to four groups of three and then the heavens opened - two lousy ends was all that we managed and the green had started to flood. Once the rain had abated out came the Bell inn supersoaker and away went the puddles. I have no idea what pact The Bell have with the church next door but it appeared the rain came and went at their behest. The rain was heavy enough to convince us to shell out 50 quid for there old supersoaker but light enough to leave the green in good shape. I put it to the vicar in the bar that i suspected shenanigan's but he just smiled at me, refusing to confirm or deny that silver had crossed palms. He did look shifty though.

Graciously the Bell allowed us an extra five minutes role up while i did the draw, probably safe in the knowledge that divine intervention would step in if things got a little hairy.

The game got underway and it was Wiggys turn to lead from the front. Now Wiggy takes a lot of stick for getting the draw, for being a bit of an all round dick, for being selfish, for not being able to call a running wood and generally being a nause. The reason all this stick Comes Wigglys way is unfortunately its true - I try my best to put a positive spin on things but i can't hide it any longer from now on it will be a warts an all account of our Wiggy. With the game being delayed Wiggy had in true Wiggy fashion got himself in a round with JP. Unfortunately for JP he was having to buy 3 drinks to every sip Wiggy took. Wigs first pint is still half supped on the side at the bell. Reason 23 Wig was drummed out of the Moseley naked and singing Christmas carols - he doesn't pull his weight in the round. On the green a bright start from wig had ground to a frustrating halt as his opponent was one-ing him to death in the centre of the green and at 19-14 down Wiggy was staring down the barrel of his first loss of the season. This motivated wig far more than a big win giving us a good start in the game so he meandered on through the game pretty badly until the no more twos cry went. At that moment he tore open his shirt to reveal his super wiggy spandex and cape and stormed back, pulling woods out of thin air and triumphantly punching the air as he gained the grand total of plus one for the side. Way to go Wig, team player of the year award is winging its way to you as we speak.

Dave Hosgood returned to the side after his enforced lay off and came face to face with a Spencer seemingly possessed with the power of all the bowling Gods. Dave stuck at it manfully but couldn't stop the tide that was Spencer eventually losing 6.

Steve once again played solidly to pick up another victory maintaining his record as our other much nicer undefeated player this season winning 16.

So after 3 we were 9 down

Jack, who had spent all afternoon telling us he was cold and ill was on at number four against the pub landlord Fran. At this stage the sky turned black and a torrent of water fell from the heavens (surely a sign of his distaste of jack and his water inferction). Jack Battled on through the cold and the rain and the pain in his winkle to pull outra great last shot playing frans game winning shot out and counting for two to win the game.

Killer strode to the green, his fury level simmering after the atrocities he had promised to bestow on the bus and truck driver earlier. Killer was having a great game but at 14-13 down his opponent Alan Parker, wearing a shirt even i wouldn't dare wear, went into overdrive giving Chris no chance to improve his score.

JP, now owed 8 pints by the villainous Wiggins, bowled well and but for a slight wobble about the mid point was always in control before closing the game out to 19.

After 6 it was 3 wins apiece and a deficit of 14

Jaymo was on earlier than usual but was bowling beautifully to lead Steve Duggins 15-7. As was always par for the course with a Duggo card on the bell he just doesn't lie down and bowled very well haul himself back to win to 17. Chris wasn't happy with the way he ended the game and i can't blame him however i have seen this so many times before with Steve against some of the best in the game.

Richie and Keith was by far the best game on the green, two quality bowlers playing a nip and tuck game throughout. Keith was laying game on with two great woods before Richie completely overshadowed Jacks final bowl earlier in the game trailing the jack to win to 19.

Dodge was at number nine and played a good tight game with only a few shots in it until the last few ends. Dodge not getting the breaks when it mattered losing 16.

After 9 we had 5 winners and 4 losers but were now 23 down


Savo was on at ten and at 10 - 4 up was bowling well, but as i hit the green Tony started another of his annoying comebacks and even managed to step on a wood of mine that was going to win the end,scoring even more shots for his team. Savo eventually got the better of Tony winning 20 and was rewarded by being branded awkward by Tony. They are a perfect match for each other.

Mick made use of the Tony interruption to add 4 shots to the bell total with me winning 7.

Meanwhile George Ali was taking Scott on a real left handers mark and racing into a 13 nil lead with some great bowling and some great strikes when Scotty had beaten his leads. Once Scotty got in though it was a different story as he lead well and left George struggling to get back in. Scotty couldn't keep George of his mark forever though and one more run took George home to 14. Scotty had though won the all important second half of the game 14-8.

7 winners and a thirteen shot loss a good performance on a green our side was unfamiliar with against a side who bowled well and were up for the fight. Although its a loss its another step up on the learning curve for the Olton and we move on to try and win next week at the Warstock. Best of luck to the Bell in their pursuit of third place.

It was a day of reunions and shocks, Warks winning at the cricket, un-forecast torrential rain visited upon us from the clergy, Jack winning away, Daisy not being 11 anymore and me being asked to be a best man because they want the Job doing properly.



As Jack won away, I thought we would celebrate with an up to date photo of the young man

Chris Downes has very Kindly Challenged Scotty , Wiggy and Killer to the Ice bucket challenge, will they be man enough to accept ?